Thursday, 17 January 2008

I feel bad ... The tale of the BM teacher.

Once upon a time, in a land 5 kilometers from my my home, there lived a BM teacher.

bitch

She was an evil lady who always made her students suffer by throwing homework at them and teaching Sastera improperly (she finished the novel in a week and never went back to it later on). Ignoring the fact that I'm being hyperbolic about her evil character, she also never pitied her students and always made sure they received bad marks in their BM exam. With that she actually had the audacity to tell parents that *student's name* was a little mischievous and she thought he/she could do better if he/she paid attention. I hate it when teachers do that: they scold you as if the world ends if your homework is not done and say "I'm gonna tell your mom/dad" and when the day comes for them to meet the parents they chicken out and say "Well ... your son/daughter is good, but he/she needs to brush up and pay attention" in the most polite tone anyone can have. Hypocrites. No ... no ... Motoloks.

Ok so now that we have established the fact that The Evil BM Teacher is a Motolok, let's call her that from now on.

So Motolok is the editor of the school magazine and she 'works hard' to keep it coming out well. She keeps all the info about the magazine in her FlashDisk; pictures, files, reports, etc. After our society took our group photographs, she gave me a sample photo to show my society members so that they will be able decide if they wanted to buy a copy. I gave it to the secretary of our club so that she could pass it around (alot of 'so that's' huh?). After she had done that she told me she put it on Motolok's table in the staff room. But when I went to her to confirm that she got it, she said that she did not. :| How uckfay-ed up huh? She started telling me stuff like she doesn't know where it was and if I didn't give it to her stuff would happen, I think. So she was really pissed at me. She also told me that my members would not get the pictures and that she did not care. Big deal! Like I gave a shit. Pfft. 8-| Anyway I hated her so much since that event. And what happened next made me happier.

One fine morning during the morning assembly, Motolok takes the mic and informs us that her handbag was stolen. Her FlashDisk was in her handbag so that meant good news for the magazine committee (Ahli Sidang Redaksi). So guess what happened then? She - get ready for this - cried. She started crying, I tell you! She was going on and on about how she was going to jinx the person who took it and other crap like that. The Senior Assistant (Penolong Kanan) tried to take the mic away from her and calmed her down, but she gripped the mic hard, kicked the Penolong Kanan in the shins, and said "Stay away from me Bitch!" And that was that.

cry

Motolok got a new handbag, started strutting around as usual, pretending that we were not making fun of her behind her back (we called her Crybaby), and did not come to class for about a month. Can you believe how irresponsible she was?? Leaving us all alone one month before we were supposed to sit for a bliddy major examination; not to mention we cannot pass SPM without a pass in BM. Our grades for that subject was the suck as it was and there she was going all emo on us.

Then during our trial examination, she came in to invigilate and she did not let go of her handbag. How funny is that? She walked around the class with her handbag hung from one shoulder. I could not stop laughing (on the inside of course).

Anyway the Friday before we sat for our first paper (BM) our school gathered all the Form Five students and got them to have a "thank you" session with their teachers. This was an opportunity for us to thank our teachers for all that they have taught us and cry our eyes out like as if we will actually miss them after that. *rolls eyes till they pop out* So I was shaking hands with my teachers and saying thank you with a huge (fake) smile when I came to Motolok. GUESS WHAT SHE TOLD ME. She told me "Sudhan, good luck for your exams. I hope you do well. I'm sorry for the fight we had earlier this year".

I was gobsmacked! I did not know what to do! I told her "No, Motolok, it was my fault mainly for being irresponsible" and told her "thank you very much". Since then I have felt bad about whatever I talked and thought about her. I'm sorry Motolok. :) I wrote this because I wanted to share this story with the World Wide Web, but you don't care do you? That's because you don't understand what I'm talking about, but thats OK.

Once again I want to stress on the point that I have been hyperbolic in explaining Motolok's character. Don't be stupid and think that she is that evil. She is actually pretty nice. I remember when I was in Form Three, I went to the canteen to get a drink when my teacher was not in class. She caught me on the way and asked me "Where are you going?" and i replied "The canteen, maam". She asked me why and I said that I wanted to buy some water. Then she asked me "You are thirsty, is it?" (Dahaga ke?) and I said "Yes you cock, why else would I want to buy a drink?" Kidding. I said "Yes" of course. The she allowed me to go. My point here is: when she asked me if I was thirsty she gave that motherly look and I thought she was a nice person. I guess I judged her too quickly. However I don't hate her anymore. :)

3 comments:

lithjunkie said...

esyay. uckfay eway llaay.

Unknown said...

rectcorray. btw-ay (LOL) for words which vowels in the beginning you just add -ay in the back and leave it at that. :P lol. u can also use the first syllable and convert it to pig latin like what i did up there. see? "rectcorray"

Kreshenka said...

haha amusin!!